Category: Marriage

You and your spouse loved each other at one point, it’s still possible to get back to the point in your marriage when you both were happy. Here are some things you can do to turn your marriage around.

These strategies will take work and it won’t be easy. How much are you willing to tough it out to save your marriage and get the love back into your life? Even if your the only one willing to save your marriage, just by doing these few things, you can actually change your spouse’s response to you. Pretty similar to when someone smiles at you, you can’t help but smile back at them as well.

So with that said, stop what how you have been behaving and try these tips on for size!

The very first thing that you have to do is to stop being so negative. That means, no more complaining and no more criticizing. Change your complaints and criticism to something constructive, positive and beneficial. Even when your spouse says or do something that upsets you. For example, if your spouse tells you “all we ever do is fight”, instead of getting defensive and say statements that will result into a fight, just tell your spouse “you know what, you’re right.” The fact that you here, frequent fights between you and your spouse is a common occurrence. Sincerely let all guards down with your spouse. Be honest and genuine and once your spouses sees you want to stop fighting, your spouse will reevaluate his own actions and words.

The second thing that you can do is that you dont pressure your spouse in any way at all. If there are problems in a marriage, it is always a common problem that one spouse is always pressuring the other to change. This is a huge mistake if you want to stop your divorce.

When you are pressuring someone, you are putting them in defense and making them more resistive. Nobody likes to be pressured so they would try to resist it. You need to stop yourself whenever you have the urge to pressure your spouse to change.

When people use “I” statements rather than “You” statements, you would be surprise at how much of a difference switching out those statements be. “I” statements are least likely going to start an argument while “You” statements are very argumentative. Think of it this way, how would you feel if your spouse said “You never want to spend time with me anymore.” Your immediate response would be “that’s not true” and that is where your fight begins. What happened if you said something along the lines of “Honey, I feel as if we don’t spend enough time together, I miss you”. Can you see the difference between “I” statements and “You” statements? Just by changing this minor detail could you potentially change the direction of your marriage.

Calgary marriage counseling centre is allowing couples to explore different ways to ensure a successful marriage. World renowned committed therapists are offering the best solution to every couple. New interactive forms are making the counseling easier and more attractive. Calgary marriage counseling is presenting professional and experienced therapists really committed to keep families together. Their goal is to strengthen the foundation of a family.

Calgary marriage counseling is building effective communication skills, and restoring the belief in the existence of a marriage. The family is considered a system, people realize the effect they have on each other and facilitate a better communication. There are fabulous lessons to be learned to build trust and understanding. The partners will have the feeling that their counselor is their friend who sincerely helps them to come over the delicate problems. Seeking counseling is the best thing to do when a marriage is in trouble. Marriage counseling can prove to be an inexpensive option when considering the possibility of what could happen.

Many people neglect to regularly invest in their marriage, and find soon themselves in trouble. When partners are concerned about marital discord, relational disharmony, it is possible to learn how to make the relationship more satisfying. Calgary marriage counseling teaches couples to build committed and strong relationships. Simple conflicts can have unexpected disastrous consequences if the partners are not communicating openly and honestly.

Calgary marriage counseling is teaching also how to practice win-win communication, as well as rediscovering love and trust. In every marriage problem, committed therapists can teach what can be done to get the relationship back on track explaining how to meet the partners’ needs. Another way to consolidate a marriage is to develop unity and mutual respect and define mutual life goals. Calgary marriage counseling is also teaching how to deal with stress and work through relationships problems. Infidelity, anger, illness, lack of communication skills can lead a marriage to distress. Calgary marriage counseling is teaching the partners to resolve the main conflicts and heal their wounds.

Calgary marriage counseling can help couples to rebuild their relationship. Couple therapy helps people to understand and then resolve conflicts to improve their communication skills and negotiate differences, in an elegant and efficient way. Counseling will be short term if the situation improves in a spectacular manner; it can be also long term collaboration in the marriage is seriously deteriorated. The most indicate frequency is once a week.

The partners will understand that there is no perfect marriage; each person has ideas, goals and values and they don’t match the spouse’s exactly. The differences can be complementary, and they say that opposites attract. People must respect and try to understand other cultures, opinions and beliefs. Sometimes a lack of interest in communication and caring is disintegrating a marriage. The stress, depression, sadness and fear can appear now. A bad relation may easily lead to other problems, creating problems on the job or affect the children’s life.

Here is an interesting fact! Did you know that early marriage is a key predictor for divorce in later life? It is understood that about half of the people who marry under the age of 18 and about 40% under the age of 20 will end up in a divorce settlement! This is research that was conducted by the atlanta Journal Constitution.

The research also went as far to mention that an estimated Ten years is the approximate lifetime of a couple that marry in their teens… end in a divorce! This is an unfortunate statement and it suggests also that if a couple marry at an early age… it ends in divorce! Marrying late is a cause for a lower quality of marriage! This has been revealed by similar research conducted in the NFI (National Fartherhood Initiative)

The ideal age to marry seems to be between 23-27 years of age! This age group is less likely to head in the direction of a divorce in comparison to the younger age group! However, the question remains due to high divorce rates.. “how can we abolish all these divorces from happening and fix the broken relationships?

Well… one of the main reasons for a divorce is infidelity. The reason for infidelity to happen in a marriage is perhaps rooted to an unsatisfactory marriage and pure boredom. It is also known that women are fast catching up with men in this area!

Another marital breakdown is poor communication which of course results in divorce if it is not dealt with correctly! If couples are becoming bad communicators toward each other.. then it is inevitable that the couple will lead themselves down the road to divorce.

Finally the last common reason why a divorce happens in a marriage is due to financial issues and disagreements where money matters. This is especially a heated reason in an economic down turn like the one we are experiencing these days in 2009! With jobs being lost on either side of the marriage… couples find it very difficult to maintain their marriage where financial stress is in abundance!

Cheating is something that shakes relationships that are in any stage. Whether your relationship has lasted for many years or you are just in the initial stages, cheating can easily bring a lot of ‘bad blood’ between you. Although dealing with affairs can be quite challenging, you do not have to let it bring down your relationship.

Cheating is very damaging because it hits at the foundation of a relationship – trust. Cheating is a betrayal of trust irrespective of the stage at which your relationship is. While people usually think of marriage when speaking about cheating, trust is something that develops before you make the commitment. If a partner cheats before marriage, it will still be a mark of betrayal of trust.

Whether you are married or not, cheating can still take place. Does what you do feel as if you are not honest with your partner? If you feel that you need to keep what is going on from your partner then you are effectively cheating.

Whatever the case, you should understand that it is only you and your partner who can decide whether you want to strengthen your relationship or part ways. This means that you will need to discuss the issue and reach a solution that you both agree on. Maintaining a stony silence will not magically make the problem disappear, and none of you will feel any better.

If you want to deal with cheating before marriage, here are some of the measures that you should consider.

Make a decision one way or the other

It will understandably be difficult to deal with cheating, even more so if your relationship has been around for quite some time. You will need to decide whether you want to end the relationship or go on and develop a stronger bond. When cheating occurs before marriage, you can use this as a stepping stone toward building a stronger relationship. You may decide to make a stronger commitment that will make your relationship have more official grounds. This form of commitment does not necessarily have to be marriage, but it should at least be formal.

Have time for your partner

We live in a busy world where people have hectic schedules. You may be so busy with other commitments that you push your relationship to the background. You may leave just leftover time for your partner, which will strain your relationship. You should include your partner in your itinerary, scheduling time for just the two of you. When you spend quality time together, neither of you will have the time to contemplate another relationship.

Indians are only now coming to terms with the concept of Indian second marriage especially for women, as in India marriage is considered to be a lifetime union come what may. This sacrosanct union is rarely broken even after the demise of a spouse for women especially and women are supposed to live their lives alone and lonely after their husband passed away. Indian society lays great stress on the bond of marriage and that is why remarriages for women are still not looked upon with much favor. Nevertheless, despite all apprehensions and misgivings, Indian second marriage is taking place as society slowly learns to accept that remarriage is not a sin and it is fully acceptable for a woman to wish to start a new life after a divorce or demise of a spouse. A woman has every right to begin her life afresh by opting for a second marriage if her first marriage did not work out or if she was left a widow.
Marriage undoubtedly signifies lifetime bonding and a relationship between man and woman which is forged stronger with every passing year. Mutual trust, love, affection and understanding are the pillars of the institution of marriage and if these pillars are strong they can withstand any storm in the marriage. Unfortunately, sometimes it is just not possible for two people to bond the way society has perceived and it is then a divorce may take place.

Indian society by and large is still a bit cool towards divorcees though enhanced exposure and awareness has somewhat mitigated this stigma. The best way to tackle this if the divorced person wishes to start a new life with a new partner is to take recourse to renowned divorce matrimonial website which will have likeminded people on its profile list. Dating divorced men or women before jumping into a second wedding is also possible with these divorced matrimonial sites.

In earlier days, if a woman was left a widow, enormous restrictions were placed on her and even the thought of remarriage was considered to be a sin. According to the orthodox beliefs of Indian society a womans life ended with that of her husband and she had no right to lead a new and happy life. But with changing times and higher levels of education, society has become more receptive to the idea of divorced dating as well as Indian second marriage.

The concept of remarriages amongst widows/widowers or divorcees needs to be encouraged and promoted as every human being has the right to lead a happy and fulfilling life and society does not have the right to impose restrictions on adults wishing to remarry. Divorced matrimonial websites are the perfect platform from where to launch your search if you are looking for a life partner the second time around and there is every chance that you will find a partner of your choice.